Fireflies

I have been finishing up a book called "Souls in Transition" for my campus ministry practicum. The book is about emerging young adults. I have decided that it is kind of strange to read a book about people in the age group that I am in. The book has been a really good source of research for me, as well as a source of personal reflection. The contents of the book reflect on how young adults see life, spirituality, friendships, community service, parents, college, marriage, job-hunting etc.

However, one common theme has stuck out to me. The theme of loneliness. One thing that I have inferred from my reading and personal reflection is that young adults are lonely. The spectrum of loneliness is a wide one -- in short, young adults are lonely in many ways. The ironic part of this particular type of loneliness is that students are in contact with people more than they ever have been thanks to technology and social networking: Texting, Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, IM, MSN chat, blogs, etc. As I was reading, unfortunately I found myself relating to this common theme. I was thinking about it and honestly my junior year is not one that I would really wish to re-live. I have found myself, in a legit and ironic way, lonely.

I have been talking with a good friend of mine about all of this -- she seems to be struggling with it, too, having moved to a new town. We were both reflecting on loneliness the other day and we were talking about how God uses us in our loneliness. She noted that she has been learning to trust God in a different way -- she has been trusting him to fill the loneliness of her heart. I think that has been happening to me, too. There are many nights when I sit with my journal and just write away, just asking God to see my heart, and to use me for something worthy. I have discovered that even though I have been struggling in particular ways, God has been responding to me in my times of desperation. He has really been excelling me in my gifts. He has been giving me opportunities to serve and respond to the gifts he has equipped me with. That part, has been glorious. In the past three months, I have been learning a lot about myself. God has constantly been pushing me beyond my comfort zone, he has been accelerating dreams and inspiring me to catch them and understand the beauty of them. And somehow, kind of like a child chasing fireflies late at night, I do.