Food for Thought

As you can imagine, I run into a lot of really great people here at the seminary. Seriously, it's amazing. It's like you throw all the awesome people together in the world and *BAM,* here they are. One of the things that I absolutely love, whether at seminary or not, is hearing peoples' stories. In one of my classes, we have been split up into small groups where we share a ministry and vocational journey together for a semester. The other day, I was talking with my group and we were sharing our journeys of how we ended up at Asbury. One story especially stuck out to me and I knew right then that it was blog material.

The question was asked: if you could do anything in ministry, what would your dream job be? When we got around to one particular person, they said, "I would love to go live by myself in a cabin in the woods and minister to people through writing. I feel like I have been burned by people, burned by the church. I am starting to trust people again, which is how I ended up here, but it took awhile." He then went on to explain how prior to seminary, he had been extremely involved with a church. The leadership of this church, however, hurt more people than it helped. He then noted how he left the church and decided to attend culinary school (I told you people at seminary have good stories!). He excelled in culinary school, enjoyed it a lot and went on to work in a restaurant. He said, "You know, I was so sick of a church that hurt people. I worked with food because I was able to be a part of something that brought people together, slowed them down and had them listen to one another." Can you just imagine a chef, peering out at his restaurant from his kitchen? Watching people truly enjoy one another's company? You know, there is that couple over there in the corner on their first date, getting to know one another, wishing time would slow down. Then, there is that couple in the booth, to your left, who is celebrating their 35th anniversary, remembering all of the times they've had together and celebrating life. After that, in the back room, at the long table, there is that annual company meeting. These folks join together to discuss annual goals and progress and to identify where they are going to go, business wise, this year. Then, you have your normals, going out to eat because it is mom's night off. In all cases, food brings people together, and as a chef, that's something to be really proud of. To me, the mental image is really powerful. My new friend ended his story with this line: "I hope the church can slow down like that." Hmmm. Food for thought. And, I think it's like "Olive Garden" food for thought. Yeah?

Jiving

Are there ever times in your life when you sit back and just realize that you are totally and completely jiving in God's plan for you? I had to take a moment to write this week because I have been overwhelmed by God's faithfulness and generosity to us here in Wilmore. For the last couple of days, Kyle and I have been going through new student orientation at Asbury. When I first saw the schedule for NSO, I was automatically excited (which isn't normally the case for school orientation!). I knew the experience was going to be great -- and it was!

First, I have to say, the staff here is beyond exceptional. They have gone out of their way to know our names  and to connect with us on a personal level. Each and every staff person that we have met, from professors to housing directors constantly repeat, "We are here to serve you. Please, let us know how we can do that. We are here for you." It's made the transitional process so much easier. Also, the students are all that we dreamed. During NSO we had the opportunity to meet so many different people that are different ages and all of them have stories about God's faithfulness in their lives. People here embody and embrace the term "community." Here are just a few things that we experienced at NSO that we really enjoyed! 

• Obviously, meeting people has been one of the highlights; from single folks to married folks to toddlers and babies, we love all those who we've met so far! 
• Chapel was an exhilarating experience as the entire community prayed for us, commissioned us and welcomed us into their community. 
• Dinner at the President's estate at Rose Hill has to be on the top of my list. We enjoyed a nice garden party and got to tour the house! That was one of my favorite parts. 
• We enjoyed lunch with the faculty today.
• My absolute favorite part happened this morning during breakfast. One of the alumni coordinators asked us to raise our hand if we decided to come to Asbury because we were influenced by an alum. I looked around and almost everyone had their hand raised. That, to me, spoke volumes. When you have something good, word of mouth will be your best marketing tool. 

Rest assured, we are being taken care of here. As we transition into this stage of our ministry, Kyle and I would appreciate your prayers, as always! We also want our family and friends to know that this has to be one of the greatest places to be, so come and visit :). We are so excited to be a part of such a Spirit-filled community. We can't wait to live this story so that we can share it with others someday. Surely, God is with us! 

Kentucky Update

We are finally in Wilmore! We've hit the week mark and we're still alive, so that's a great thing :-)! Kyle's parents and my dad helped us move down last week. We arrived Monday evening and they left for home on Thursday morning. We were so thankful for their help moving and they even bought us a dresser! Aren't parents great? Moreover, we have seen God's hand move in mighty ways already, reassuring us that He is ever-present on this journey. I thought I would share a few of our "God gifts" as my mother-in-law, Mary Lou, refers to them as:

• The dresser was a definite God gift -- ours didn't make the trip so well, it was leaning tower of dresser, about to fall apart at any second. Of course, people can live without dressers, but it's a nice God gift given through our parents. 
• When transferring things into our name, we found out that we didn't have to pay a $125 water deposit because of good credit. Proof that credit cards used responsibly actually hold a lot of weight in some situations. 
• I had a job interview last Thursday and was offered a part-time job at the School of World Missions here at the Seminary. It was a definite God-gift to help bring a little bit more money into our budget each month.
• The people of Wilmore and everyone at the seminary are all God-gifts to us as well. Everyone has been more than helpful and welcoming, making us feel at home in return. That's hard to do when you're 1,000 miles away from home. 

This is a journey for sure. As we continue on it, we'd ask for your prayers in one significant way -- Kyle still needs a job. He is going through the process of becoming a substitute teacher, which should actually be a pretty good gig once all of the paperwork is finished. It's hard to get into the school systems down here unless you already have a Kentucky license. We are hoping that by substituting, he will be able to get his foot in the door. 

With that all said, we wish blessings on so many of our family and friends, who we carry with us. We especially think of our friends who are also away from home and on adventures of their own. Godspeed to the many who leave and sacrifice often, not out of selfishness, but out of calling. Amen! 

{Words}

We've finally set a date to move to Kentucky. Looks like August 13th will be the big day. This entire summer, I was sure that we would be moving August 20-something. Seminary doesn't even start until September and we didn't really need to be in Kentucky until the end of August anyway. I say all of that to say this: the new moving date really has me worried.

Last night, Kyle and I were sitting on our couch talking about the move. He's so calm. I am so not. What's even worse is that I realize 1,000 times a day that I put us in this situation. For some reason I am starting to consciously realize that there are a lot of unknowns. And.it.freaks.me.out.

So, this is where the story actually gets encouraging and interesting. Yesterday morning, I was reading my Bible and journaling when I also decided to pick up a book called "John Wesley on Prayer." I've been following along with this book on a daily basis for awhile now because I love prayer and I love John Wesley. That's excuse enough. The "JW thought" that I read for the day was titled "Deny self to obey the Lord." Basically it ripped me a part. It talked about how when we are in times of dryness or pain (or worry) we often forget to be fervent in Spirit. I am not going to lie, the seminary process hasn't been easy or enjoyable really for me. And I've realized that I have been praying a lot for Kyle to get a job and for God to "provide" without really even having faith in my own prayers. Much more, my prayers have been selfishly centered around me {and Kyle} by default.

I realized that this was at the root of my problems. My prayer life has felt dry because my prayers are so selfish and faithless. My long prayers have only caused me more agony. With that said, I bring 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 to the table: "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing...give thanks." The best way I can put this is only in John Wesley's own words: "Our Lord has purchased joy, as well as righteousness for us. Thanksgiving is inseparable from true prayer; it is almost essentially connected to it. One who always prays is ever-giving praise, whether it's in ease or pain, both for prosperity and great adversity."

My prayer life needed re-routed. Instead of praying for the perfect job for Kyle or the perfect type of provision for us, I choose, instead, to offer up prayers of thanksgiving for the ways that God has already provided and will provide for us in the future. If the Bible is clear about anything it's that God does indeed take care of us. The only way I can think of to end this rather emotional blog for me is to say "truly" or "Amen," hoping that these words are prayers themselves.

#MarriageandMedia

About a month ago, I wrote a blog called #MourningandMedia, it related to how social media is now a very real and big part of the mourning process when people in our world and our communities pass away. I have been wanting to make a mini-series out of this type of social media thing and gathered some new-found inspiration to write this blog. So, today I bring you, #MarriageandMedia

In the same way that social media helps our world mourn, we see the same effect when it comes to celebration. For Kyle and I, this summer is the wedding summer on steroids. We know SO many couples getting married. One of the funniest things that I have observed when my FB friends get married is the constant check-back to their profiles (Heck, yes, I do this, too!). Your own FB world tunes in to your big day by constantly refreshing the page, looking for a way to connect with you on a personal level. We hear stuff like this all the time when we are observers and even say them ourselves: "Are there any pictures of them up yet?" "Oh my gosh, look at her dress, it looks just like her!" "Have they changed their relationship status yet?" "Has she changed her last name yet?" "Where did they go on their honeymoon? Are there pictures yet?" We say all this in the name of being connected and sometimes, nosy :).

Social media is a tool we use to celebrate. So what? I think this is awesome! I love receiving messages and posts on FB talking about the wedding. However, sometimes, I think we go too far. Some couples go as far as incorporating FB into their wedding ceremony by changing their relationship status at the altar, right before their first wedded kiss. In a poll/study done by David's Bridal, they noted that nearly 50% of brides change their name between the wedding and reception. Other couples create their honeymoon album on FB while they are on their honeymoon! Isn't it a honeymoon and not a communitymoon? Send some updates here and there, but play a little hard-to-get with your FB world and spend some new time with your spouse! Upload your photos when you get back.

Now, the thing that brought me down-to-earth the most with this whole social media thing is changing my name on Facebook. Everyone keeps asking, "When are you going to change your name on Facebook, Mrs. Just?" Why does everyone want me to change my name? Why do I want to change my name? Because it is the FIRST thing that will say "Molly Just." Unlike a driver's license or any other government issued document, the first public thing that will say "Molly Just" is my Facebook page, it's instant, giving me and everyone in my FB world an accomplished feeling. Well, until your last name is "Just." Apparently I cannot change my last name because "Just" violates FB name standards. Whatever that means. So, in order to change my name online, I must upload a copy of a government issued I.D. I think Facebook wins this one. In the meantime, I will enjoy being "Molly Komlofske" online until some sort of identification comes in.Click on the screen shot below.

#MourningandMedia

So many blogs have been written about social media in the past decade and the weight that it holds in our lives. Lately I have been thinking about social media and death. We've all seen Twitter kill Justin Beiber, Jackie Chan, etc. Ha, ha Twitter. The Beib and Chan live on! Today, I want to hit on something a bit more serious. Lately I have been evaluating the reactions that people have on social media when loved ones die. How strange it is to pull up Facebook and find your friend still well preserved online. Facebook tells you to "message him or her" or "tell him or her happy birthday." It's a strange dichotomy.

Young people now cope in a different way. Memorial groups are created on Facebook and loved one's walls are covered in truly heart-felt messages. Supportive comments are given and prayers are lifted up. #Hashtags are created. And somehow, we don't forget. A visit to a Facebook wall or group is only a click away, providing an unspoken relief to those affected by the grief, even months down the road.  

Again, a strange dichotomy. They are dead, but they are somehow alive. I think this type of coping is a new and natural part of our society, especially in the younger generation. In some way, of course, it's healthy. It's like modified journaling and somehow social media connects us in more than just one way back to a person. At the same time, we cannot forget the importance of stepping out into community and being healthy that way. We can't forget what it means for us, psychologically, to talk real words with people in the flesh. We must remember that sitting around and sharing memories is just as important as sharing them on Facebook, even more so, in my opinion. 

In my mind, there are two things to glean from this. 1. Social media opens up a new way to cope and that can be a really great thing. 2. Psychologically, we must help prepare people to deal with mourning in an even greater way. Part of that includes being present for one another.

A Novel Idea

A mock tablescape -- we were trying to get a feel for the real thing!

When Kyle and I got engaged on August 6, 2011, I knew I wanted to plan the wedding of the 2012 Western Kansas summer! They say that girls dream of their weddings from the time that they are young. I was one of those, I am sure. I particularly remember wearing a big white quilt as a wedding dress and one of my mom's white slips as a veil (countless times) when I was little. Looking back, I am positive that I looked more like a nun rather than a bride. Oh well. Fast forward 18 years and here I am. After getting engaged, I decided that the details of a wedding and the possible hospitality that a wedding can provide were going to be of the utmost importance to me. So, with the help of Southern Weddings Magazine, I decided to put a novel idea into practice and I am writing to report that it's actually taking place.

Upon engagement, my mom bought me some different wedding magazines to get ideas -- Southern Weddings was one. In one article, I noticed a story of a bride and her mother who scouted vintage china plates to feed all 275 of their guests at their wedding dinner. I was immediately interested. Who does that? Not to mention, it must be extremely expensive. Nevertheless, I was intrigued. I mentioned the idea to my mother-in-law-to-be, Mary Lou, and she asked me when we were going to get started. I thought, "Well, I guess this could be a possibility." So, we started telling people what we were wanting to do and we all started scouting out thrift stores, antique shops and Goodwills for random plates. For a while, I honestly thought the idea would flop. Our goal was to collect over 300 plates for our wedding supper. Low and behold, in the time that it takes a woman to conceive and bear a child, we have collected over 300 plates for our wedding dinner! So, I must say a few things. First, THANK YOU x 1000000000 to all who helped us collect -- My mom, Aunt Nancy, Jackie Nichols, Becky Miller, Mary Lou Just, Betsy Bunnel, Grandma Bowers to name a few! Second, I am happy to report that this project cost approx. .50 a plate, perhaps even less. Third, Goodwill has a lot of china plates looking for a home. Fourth, you might discover your great grandmother's china in an old garage if you search hard enough. Fifth, for all those searching brides who might want to put this idea into practice, I will have a lot of plates when things are said and done :). Last of all, what an amazing opportunity to build relationships, search, scour and bond and make this wedding experience a fantastic one. I'd encourage all brides to find a special project like this that can bring family, friends and loved ones together.